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Let's not change & stay the same
Friday, March 26, 2010
This is gonna be super belated but I think I should.  TILL DEATH DO YOU PART It's been pretty long since I last went to a malay wedding ceremony. I swear I didn't think I'd cry. As I watched the groom and the Bride's Dad sitting beside, I just couldn't help myself. I was tearing crazy and Zaini was so sweet to stand by me and constantly stroking my back to calm me down. The thought of one leaving her family ESPECIALLY her parents to be with the groom, it breaks my heart. I know what I'm feeling is wrong and marriage is a good thing I know it's a bloody good thing. But to just see the look on the Dad's face, Idk why. I cannot help it. That night, Zaini brought me to play swing cause he knew I was so disturbed. & YES I WAS. Marriage was a cruel thing. How can anybody leave her family after all the years and live a man. I might get hate tags for saying all this. But I told Zaini no way am I getting married, I'll just be in a relationship with him but I want to live with my parents. I don't care. I hate growing up and I don't want to grow up. I REFUSE TO GROW UP. I want to have Papa texting me I love you and take care of yourself every once in a while. To have Mama telling me that I must always take care of myself and making me feel so special. To have Zaini pat my head when I do something good or buy me sweets when I behave for the day. I don't want to be responsible, I don't want to be matured, I DON'T WANT TO BE INDEPENDENT. I don't like today already ah thanks. Kayz bye. With love, Nur Edlin Effendi at 12:02 PM
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